Cinco de Cuatro is a Newport Beach holiday started by Lucille and George Bluth in 1982 as a way to destroy all Cinco de Mayo food and decorations so Lucille's Hispanic staff wouldn't take May 5 off as part of their "war on May the 5th".
The festival grew over the years and was eventually embraced by the Hispanic community. The annual event concludes with a boat parade called "The Festival of Lights," a phrase the Bluths wanted to reclaim.
- Translated from Spanish to English, "Cinco de Cuatro" means "five of four".
Narrator: The holiday started as a particularly vicious response by a young Lucille Bluth to the Mexican holiday of Cinco de Mayo.
Lucille: We should start our own holiday.
Narrator: You see the Hispanics of Newport liked Cinco a lot. But high up on Coast Highway, Lucille Bluth did not. [...] And then Lucille had a horrible thought. A thought that was thoughtless and better to not. "What if" she thought, with a sneering grin...
Lucille: ...next year what if the party didn't even begin?
Narrator: And so began a holiday on the eve of the fifth of May, originally intended to deplete the party supplies the Cinco de Mayo celebrants were relying upon. Over 30 years, however, it grew and was soon embraced by the Hispanic community — for financial reasons.From "Flight of the Phoenix"
Cinco de Cuatro 2012
Several notable events happened at Cinco de Cuatro 2012:
- Lucille Austero campaigned for Congress and after running into multiple Bluth family members she disappeared, appearing to have been murdered by being pushed down the stair car ("Queen B.") ("Off the Hook") ("Blockheads")
- Herbert Love campaigned for Congress and planned to give a speech to rally support, until he disappeared. ("Red Hairing") ("Off the Hook")
- Tobias, Argyle Austero, and residents of Austerity performed a rendition of Fantastic 4: An Action Musical. ("Smashed") ("Queen B.")
- A keynote speech for Fakeblock was given by mysterious tech tycoon George Maharis. ("Blockheads")
- A drunk Michael Bluth attempted to prostitute himself to Lucille 2 but she rejected his advances. ("Flight of the Phoenix") ("Blockheads")
- Herbert Love called off his affair with Lindsay. To retaliate she accused him of sexual harassment but got caught up in the crowd's fervor and made a right-wing speech in favor of the US/Mexico wall. ("Red Hairing")
- G.O.B. hired a Mongol horde to build the wall between the US and Mexico but George told him they had no funds, so the horde rioted. ("Blockheads")
- George Michael gave a keynote speech about FakeBlock. ("Blockheads")
- Maeby found out Perfecto Telles was only 17 years old at the time they slept together. ("Señoritis")
- Buster attempted to get even with Ophelia Love and Herbert Love by giving their political opponent Lucille Austero photos of Lindsay and Love together. He then found out Lucille 2 has also been using him, so in a rage he accidentally punched Herbert Love into a coma. ("Off the Hook")
- Lucille Bluth had a nervous breakdown because she believed she was seen as the villain in her family. Tobias gave her pseudo-therapy to help her realize that she's just misunderstood. ("Queen B.")
- Tobias assembled the Austerity patients to perform a rendition of Fantastic 4: An Action Musical. On his way to the stage he accidentally boarded the wrong boat, joining Marky Bark on route to destroy Herbert Love's barge with a bomb. The bomb accidentally detonated on their boat. ("Smashed") ("Queen B.")
- George found out from Dr. Norman he had no more testosterone in his body. He then found a red wig and decided to become a woman. ("Double Crossers")
- Dr. Norman dumps the remains of his medical career into the bay. ("Double Crossers")
- DeBrie Bardeaux finds Dr. Norman's pills and passes out in a pile of debris. ("Smashed")
- Gene Parmesan works at a Chicken Dan's Donkey Punch stall. ("Off the Hook")